I met him in my dream
June 15, 2006 by kahhwee
I couldn’t really remember all but these.
He looked in the pink of condition in his coat and tie, just like how he looked when he’s still in our school before his retirement. Totally different from that when i last met him one year ago whilst his white hair revealed his poor heatlh condition. I felt curious about what was going on since i heard that he had been in incurable state of leukaemia. Well, maybe miracle happened and he’s healthy again, i thought. "So did you receive our card?" I asked. "Yes, thanks for the concern." "You’re welcome, we want you to know that we love you."
Then i woke up and suddenly recalled that i received an sms informing about his death in the evening of the day before the dream. While grieving for him, i was thinking whether i REALLY met HIM. Did he really receive what i told him in dream? I guess not. I don’t expect him to remember me, one of his numerous students during his lifetime. I just hope that he knows that there’re still some students who remember him, respect him and even love him. 5 days before he passed away, we wrote a card to show our appreciation for all he‘d done for our school, and requested a teacher to pass it to him. Hope that he received it (although i think, most likely, he didn’t).
They have similar fate.
He passed away a few years after his retirement too, leaving me a salutary lesson that i’ll never forget. He was a teacher too. Of course, for me, he’s much more than that. He appeared in my dreams too, as i wanted it so badly. But i didn’t (perhaps, never) have the chance to express my gratitude to him as well as, my affection for him. That was my greatest regret in my life, at least, up to now.
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I reckon that i should have a mental preparation for everyone’s death, including, of course, mine, that may come anytime. Does it mean that i’ll have minimal sorrow while they occur? I’m rather ambivalent about this. On the one hand, i hope so, but on the other, i don’t think (and hope) so. Kah hwee~ poor little creature… 
