6.6_KahHwee_6.6

Ok i know i have not updated this blog for a super long time, until i myself thought that i will never update it again.

However, i just received this email that made me rather emotional. It brings me back to who i was in the past, reminds me what i was thinking and insisting in the past, which i have nearly forgotten about.

It was a letter written by me on 19th October, 2006, to be delivered to me on 20th October, 2007. I have totally forgotten this until i received it and read it again.

When i read it, i felt like it was written by another person. That shows how much i’ve changed over this one-year time.

From: FutureMe.org <mailer@futureme.org>
Date: Oct 20, 2007 12:03 AM
Subject: I’m excited to know how you are now…
To: hwee28687@gmail.com

The following is an e-mail from the past, composed on Thursday, October 19, 2006, and sent via FutureMe.org
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Dear FutureMe,

You should be very clear about what you want to pursue in your life already, shouldn’t you?

This
question is the one that i spent the most time to ponder about in this
year… Life is full of changes and uncertainties. What is you main aim
in life now? Is it still the same as mine: contribute to the world as
much as you could (quantitative and qualitative wise); explore the
world, learn and try new things so that you will have a enriched and
fulfilled life…? You must have been a bit different as things are not
constant. But i hope that you can still at least retain the beautiful
heart, if not developing it… I know you may have been faced with lots
of frustrations that contaminated your heart and mind, making you
afraid of the society, more specifically, the dark side of human
nature, and driving you to the decision of treating others with equally
dirty heart… No, Kah Hwee. Life is beautiful. It’s all about your
attitude and mindset towards the life. Remember? You always think that
despite being mistreated (sometimes), you still have to continue using
your kind and genuine heart to treat others. If not, vicious cycle
arises. I think these are very nice thoughts. Please do not forget
them, okay? Bear them in mind for life…

Side note: Do you
still rememeber who *** *** is? She is sitting beside me now… She is
the one reminding me to add this in this letter to you… Where is she
now? Is she doing what she really want? Haha i hope you still remember
this self-proclaimed ‘cute’ roommate… Contact her now, if you realize
that you have not done that recently…

I’m wondering whether
you are doing Social Work now… If yes, where would it be? Malaysia,
Singapore, Australia, New Zealand or some other countries that i have
not thought about so far? I would feel a bit sad if you are not
studying Social Work. What are the other things suitable to
you? Finance? I don’t think the realistic and practical world suits
you. You will have difficulties there, i guess. Computing? You know you
are quite interested but the life of being an IT specialist may be
boring for you. Most importantly, you can’t do what you truly desire…
Hmm… but… once again, things are bound to changes. Maybe something
have changed your mind. I know you have your reasons behind your
choices and decisions.

So how about your relationship? Are you
having any boyfriend (or potential candidates) now? Any admirers
recently? Haha… If you are still single, i would feel a bit worried
about you… Hey don’t be so choosy la… Try giving others some
chance. You won’t know whether he is suitable or not until you try,
right? Good luck to you! Currenly i’m confused with my own feelings
too. I don’t know whether love is about feeling, or understanding
towards one another. I would feel that the latter is more important,
but sometimes if it does not come along with feeling, what should i do?
Or vice versa, if you have feeling towards some guy but the
relationship does not seem promising in the long run, should you go for
it? I know, both of the components can co-exist. I hope it happens too.
Just that sometimes when it does not happen as i wish, should i just
wait for another one? I’m afraid that i’ll miss the opportunity and
never have it again…

Okay, it’s rather long already. Hope that
i didn’t sound childish and immature to you… All the best in your
future endeavours okay? Be confident in youself. I put high faith in
you. Bye.